Seamus Levine
Seamus Levine (pronounced "SHAY'-muss") is a tough fisherman with wood for arms and legs. He is also blind in one eye, and so wears a black eye-patch. He is a blatant parody of fictional salty sea-dogs and pirates. He is in the habit of emerging from the shadows to warn Peter of the prospective dangers when Peter is about to do something at sea such as in "A Fish out of Water". He once again emerges from the shadows to warn Peter about the dangers of the sea in "The Perfect Castaway", this time about the enormous waves which could destroy his ship. In "Model Misbehavior", Seamus and his fisherman catch Meg, along with a bunch of fish, in a net while at sea. For some reason he carries around, rolled up in one of his wooden arms, a picture of a diseased prostate, a cat doing pull ups, a map of Middle Earth, and the band Primus in "Stewie Loves Lois", seen when Peter starts having prostate troubles. He also has a habit of writing somewhat-lame jokes, featuring outdated terminology, and then asking whether they are successful or not, for instance in "Movin' Out (Brian's Song)", when Stewie refers to the cobbler and apothecary. He also is a talented organist, as seen in "Boys Do Cry", where he auditions to become Quahog's church organist, performing Jerry Lee Lewis' "Great Balls of Fire". He has wooden arms and legs, and has even been asked about this wooden body parts in "A Fish out of Water", when he sarcastically snarks, "No, me father was a tree." He later claims he was a wooden puppet carved by James Woods and in a parody of Pinocchio, was wished to life, claiming Woods didn't wish hard enough, only bringing his head to life, in "And Then There Were Fewer". Though, he later states to just have been a regular guy, until he got baked one night with James Woods, who ate his arms and legs. In "Peter & Lois' Wedding", he is shown as one of young Lois' suitors. At that time, he has a perfectly normal set of arms and legs. In "Ocean's Three and a Half" when Seamus is seen naked, his body is entirely wooden while his head is human, bringing into question how he can sustain life. He played Byron Hadley in Family Guy's portrayal of The Shawshank Redemption, the second segment of "Three Kings". In a DVD exclusive scene, Seamus tries out for Fox News Channel in "FOX-y Lady". He gets a ship in a bottle for Christmas in "Road to the North Pole". In "Tiegs for Two", he attends Quagmire's class on how to pick up women. In "Cool Hand Peter", Seamus attempts to join in Peter, Joe, Cleveland and Quagmire's road trip only to be rejected by Peter. In "The Blind Side" he tells a woman in a bar, who also has wooden prosthetics, that his limbs are made of cheap plasterboard and he can't get them wet. He is seen in "Brian's Play" hanging out with Brian as he discusses his play with Allison. He also briefly stops Peter from talking to Brian until he is sure that Brian is fine with it. In "Chris Cross", Mayor Adam West flashes the Quahog Mini-Mart and makes his escape in a getaway car Seamus is driving. In "The Simpsons Guy", during the courtroom scene, he is seated next to the Sea Captain. While fishing in "The 2000-Year-Old Virgin", Seamus hauls in a load of laptops, dumped by the likes of people such as Peter to hide porn of various nature. He appears dressed as Mayor Adam West in "A Lot Going On Upstairs" when Brian tries to fool Stewie by dressing the family and neighbors as each other. In return Tom Tucker dressed as him. In "Christmas is Coming", Seamus introduces his son Woody, who he insists will become a regular character, although no one is really interested. Seamus is also shown working as a mall Santa. Notes * He and Lois have auditioned for the same job twice: news anchor in the DVD cut of "FOX-y Lady" and church organist in "Boys Do Cry". * In the extended DVD cut of "And Then There Were Fewer", Dr. Hartman scares Seamus with a knife, causing him to void a pile of acorns. * Seamus' surname is revealed as "Levine" in "Valentine's Day in Quahog". Episode Appearances *FG310 "A Fish out of Water" *FG410 "Model Misbehavior" *FG412 "The Perfect Castaway" *FG422 "Sibling Rivalry" *FG423 "Deep Throats" *FG501 "Stewie Loves Lois" *FG513 "Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey" *FG515 "Boys Do Cry" *FG602 "Movin' Out (Brian's Song)" *FG603 "Believe It or Not, Joe's Walking on Air" *FG707 "Ocean's Three and a Half" *FG709 "The Juice Is Loose" *FG710 "FOX-y Lady" *FG712 "420" *FG715 "Three Kings" (as Captain Byron Hadley) *FG716 "Peter's Progress" *FG810 "Big Man on Hippocampus" *FG901 "And Then There Were Fewer" *FG905 "Baby, You Knock Me Out" *FG907 "Road to the North Pole" *FG908 "New Kidney in Town" *FG909 "And I'm Joyce Kinney" (cameo) *FG913 "Trading Places" *FG914 "Tiegs for Two" *FG1008 "Cool Hand Peter" *FG1011 "The Blind Side" *FG1014 "Be Careful What You Fish For" *FG1021 "Tea Peter" *FG1022 "Family Guy Viewer Mail No. 2" *FG1102 "Ratings Guy" *FG1104 "Yug Ylimaf" *FG1110 "Brian's Play" *FG1112 "Valentine's Day in Quahog" *FG1113 "Chris Cross" *FG1116 "12 and a Half Angry Men" *FG1117 "Bigfat" (special opening) *FG1118 "Total Recall" *FG1119 "Save the Clam" *FG1201 "Finders Keepers" *FG1210 "Grimm Job" (in fairy tale) *FG1212 "Mom's the Word" *FG1216 "Herpe, the Love Sore" *FG1301 "The Simpsons Guy" *FG1306 "The 2000-Year-Old Virgin" *FG1315 "Once Bitten" *FG1316 "Roasted Guy" *FG1414 "Underage Peter" *FG1415 "A Lot Going On Upstairs" *FG1416 "The Heartbreak Dog" *FG1417 "Take a Letter" *FG1505 "Chris Has Got a Date, Date, Date, Date, Date" *FG1514 "The Dating Game" *FG1604 "Follow the Money" *FG1605 "Three Directors" *FG1606 "The D in Apartment 23" *FG1616 ""Family Guy" Through the Years" *FG1619 "The Unkindest Cut" *FG1705 "Regarding Carter" *FG1708 "Con Heiress" *FG1712 "Bri, Robot" *FG1715 "No Giggity, No Doubt" *FG1719 "Girl, Internetted" *FG1803 "Absolutely Babulous" (mentioned) *FG1806 "Peter & Lois' Wedding" *FG1807 "Heart Burn" *FG1809 "Christmas is Coming" Category:Major Characters